Peascod’al Activity

The “Forgotten English” for today was the phrase “peascod wooing,” which means…well, let me just give you the quote from W.C. Hazlitt’s 1870 book, Faiths and Folklore of the British Isles:

If a young woman, while she is shelling peas, meets with a pod of nine [peas], the first young man who crosses the threshold afterwards is to be her husband. In Scotland it is, or was, a custom to rub with peastraw [fodder made from pea stalks and leaves] a girl to whom her lover has not been true.

If I’d known it was that easy… This afternoon, my mother suggested I join a singles’ bowling league advertised in the events calendar of a local marketplace newspaper. But apparently I just need to start hanging around women who shell a lot of peas, perhaps surreptitiously walking in and out of thresholds as they do so. I’ve actually been to the “rock ‘n’ roll” bowling this group participates in, not as part of any singles group, but just with friends. It was fun, but as a few people pointed out when I mentioned this earlier on Twitter, if I joined the group, I’d almost certainly find it populated by a bunch of guys and maybe one scared, or more likely bored, girl. And I’m not sure paying to hang out with a bunch of dudes who’d rather be meeting women is really what I want to be doing.

It doesn’t help that the advertisement also suggests, for more information, that one visit the group’s Geocities page.

Beyond that, it was just a really nice day here. The weather was more like early summer than spring, so I went for a nice walk around the neighborhood after lunch. Along the way I listened to Ken Plume’s “A Bit a of a Chat with Bill Corbett, of MST3K and Rifftrax fame. It was a decent interview, and I think Corbett offered some decent writing advice.

When I got home, I discovered I had received an early birthday present in the mail. Heather sent me a really great assortment of Canadian literature, a box full of neat looking books I’m eager to dive into. I may take one of them with me on my trip next week to San Jose, since I’m likely to have some down time during the conference — and plenty of it on the plane trips from one coast to the other. (I’m about halfway through Phillip Pullman’s The Subtle Knife, and I don’t expect the remainder to last me through the rest of next week, much less to next Sunday.) Heather also included a Moleskine notebook, for my own writing, which I neglect a whole lot more than I should. She’s a really good writer herself, and inspiring, so I’ll have to make damn sure I make use of the notebook. The whole package was an unexpected delight — you can’t really go wrong sending me a box full of books — and I don’t feel quite so bad about turning thirty-three next week.

Beyond the walk and the weather and the books, I spent some of the day playing episode three of Wallace and Gromit’s Grand Adventures, once I could actually get the installation file to download. And then this evening I watched Paranormal Activity, which I guess was effectively scary to a point, especially on what was clearly such a low budget, but also a little disappointing. And I say that having been a pretty big fan of The Blair Witch Project, to which this movie has inevitably been compared. I think A.O. Scott said it best in his review:

By any serious critical standard, “Paranormal Activity” is not a very good movie. It looks and sounds terrible. Its plot is thin and perforated with illogic. The acting occasionally rises to the level of adequacy. But it does have an ingenious, if not terribly original, formal conceit — that everything on-screen is real-life amateur video — that is executed with enough skill to make you jump and shriek. There is no lingering dread. You are not likely to be troubled by the significance of this ghost story or tantalized by its mysteries. It’s more like a trip to the local haunted house, where even the fake blood and the tape-loop of howling wind you have encountered 100 times before can momentarily freak you out.

It’s effective, and probably was a whole lot more so in the midnight movie screenings the studio promoted it with, but it’s not particularly clever or memorable.

Though there is one moment in the film I really liked. Horror movies of “found footage” like this — like Blair Witch or Cloverfield or Quarantine — often have to make excuses for why a character persists in filming events rather than, you know, running in terror from them. There’s plenty of that here — lots of “put down the camera” and “we need a record of this” talk — but there’s one moment where one character says, “Turn off the camera,” and the other character just does. It’s not an important or eventful moment in the movie, but it’s a nice, realistic little detail that’s often missing from movies of this ilk.

(I think I may have to check out the Rifftrax version all the same, though.)

Anyway, that was my Saturday.

Just your typical, average Friday

Today is Friday, and I don’t have an awful lot to say about it beyond that.

I spent the day for the most part immersed in PowerPoint, which is nobody’s idea of a great time, but at least I’m making progress on pulling these lecture slides together. I got through about seven chapters today, the first half of the book, and hopefully will be able to more or less finish in the two days I’m in the office next week. I head to San Jose on Wednesday for a 5-day conference — and maybe the world’s least exciting destination for my birthday — and there are a few projects I’d like to make somebody else’s problem before I leave.

I’m probably not going to get the latest issue of Kaleidotrope out before I go, however. It’s largely finished, beyond a little last-minute tweaking and the printing, so it will definitely be mailed out in April. But the end-of-March timing just doesn’t work in my favor. It’s a really good issue, so if you haven’t subscribed yet, now would be a great time to do so. Just indicate you want your subscription to start with issue #8. There’s almost certainly going to be three issues total this year, so now’s a good time to get on board!

Other than that, not much to report. It’s just your typical, average Friday.

Making the thirteenth

Today’s bit of Forgotten English is “monkey board,” meaning (as I’m sure you’ve already guessed) “the step at the rear of an omnibus on which the conductor stands.” Which isn’t especially relevant for today, but I do like rider etiquette, supposedly from Eliza Leslie’s 1859 Behavior Book:

If on stopping an omnibus you find that a dozen people are already seated in it, draw back and refuse to add to the number, giving no heed to the assertion of the driver that there is plenty of room. You have no right to crowd them, even if you are willing to be crowded yourself — a thing that is extremely uncomfortable and very injurious to your dress, which may in consequence be so squeezed and rumpled as to never look well again. A lady will always regret making the thirteenth.

Somehow I just don’t see that going over so well with today’s busy morning commuters. Although “making the thirteenth” does sound vaguely like a naughty euphemism.

In other news, I spent the day juggling several projects, though mostly pulling together some materials for a pair of instructor websites we’re designing. I’m not saying that Microsoft PowerPoint is pure evil or anything. I’m just saying the jury’s still out. I’m building these slides myself, based on the author’s detailed outline and the text, so it’s a little slower going. It may very well drive me crazy before I’m through — if not in need of some of the counselors this book is intended to train.

And that’s about it. Of course, my fortune cookie with dinner this evening insisted, “Your life becomes more and more of an adventure!” Although, aside from slightly burning my upper lip on the General Tso’s chicken, that so far doesn’t seem to be the case…and even that’s pretty shabby as far as “adventure goes.” We shall see.

Thursday various

  • Go on, ask me anything.
  • This future of publishing ad — which I’m seeing re-posted everywhere — is clever. And sure, the whole “death of publishing” thing is all in how you look at it. But, at the same time — and watch the video before you read this — I found it a little too gimmicky. Maybe it’s the length, since it is a little too long to be a truly effective advertisement, or maybe it’s that they kind of had to cheat to make the trick of it work. It is clever, though, I won’t argue with that.
  • This isn’t new, but c’mon, how can you resist a headline like Pentagon Looks to Breed Immortal ‘Synthetic Organisms,’ Molecular Kill-Switch Included? [via]
  • Manahatta: same as it ever was, same as it ever was.
  • And finally, John Seavey on George Lucas’ biggest mistake:

    But all that gets lost in the sheer awesomeness of the Jedi. The signal-to-noise ratio is too high–Yoda is a cool Wise Old Master with all the good bits in Episode Five, Qui-Gon Jinn is played by Liam Neeson and Mace Windu is Samuel Freaking Jackson, and the lightsaber is the coolest weapon in the history of film. Everyone takes Yoda’s words at face value–even the authorized sequels, which show Luke trying to re-establish the Jedi in the image of the old order. Everyone assumes that Luke narrowly won his struggle with the Dark Side at the end, but in fact, he did exactly what people do every day. He got upset, he channeled his anger constructively, and then he calmed down. Only the Manichean nutbags who run the Jedi and the Sith think that this is some kind of near-impossible achievement. The Jedi aren’t the heroes of the film, Luke is, for realizing that there’s something more than the false duality that trapped and ultimately destroyed his father.

    That’s the message of the Star Wars films, and it’s a shame that Lucas made it so hard for people to notice.

Kiss me, I’m Irish!

Happy Saint Patrick’s Day, everyone! Or, as we like to call it in New York, Drunk Tourists in the Street Before Lunchtime Day! Seriously, I can’t remember seeing this many obnoxious people in matching colors since my last home football game weekend at Penn State. I went for a walk around 12:30, since it was such a nice day outside, and I walked past several dozen bars with cheap shamrock decorations taped to the windows. I hadn’t had lunch yet and already some of these people — some who looked all of twelve or thirteen, I have to say — were can’t-get-up-off-the-ground or shout-random-things-at-strangers drunk. I suspect not a one of them was Irish.

For my (half-Irish on my mother’s side) part, I wore green today but didn’t even think to lift a pint. When I finally did have lunch, it was a slice of pizza and some fruit salad. I do drink on occasion, though almost never in the middle of the day — and then only in social situations — but I find the whole idea of taking the morning off to go binge drinking pretty depressing.

But beyond that, it was actually a really nice day. I sent a project I’m working on to our UK office, to get the ball rolling on a website we’re creating, and I put another manuscript into review. I also spent some time tracking down authors of some older books, with an eye towards developing new editions. So far, only one of them appears to have died since the previous edition, so that’s going well.

I did send out a bunch of rejection letters for Kaleidotrope, though, which is never fun. I noted earlier today on Twitter that when I read a story, I am looking for reasons to reject it. But, more than that, I’m looking for a story that doesn’t give me any reasons. I want to love every story, even if I don’t realistically have room for all of them, but in practice I’m going to love only a very small percentage. The number of stories I’ll hate is an even smaller percentage, of course, but that just means the vast number are somewhere in between. And it’s not that in-between stuff that I’m really looking for.

Anyway, that was my Wednesday. Right now, I think I need to take the dog out, and then I’m going to watch this new FX show Justified and go to bed.