Yesterday I got a juicer. I dropped apples and celery and carrots and such into the top and watched everything that went in at the top turn into juice and pulp. Vegetables you could drink. “This is fun,” I thought.

I woke up from dreams this morning, in which my interest in juicing had led me to experiment with other things you could juice, and in which I had begun to juice books and photographs. I was mildly surprised to find that you could extract the essential essence from any book or picture in the form of a juice, removing the pulp. “Why has no-one else thought of this?” I wondered, as I turned several thick novels I’ve not had time to read into half a cup of pleasant-tasting liquid I could drink in moments. “I’ll probably get a medal for discovering this.”

And I woke up, half-disappointed, half-amused.