Knowing is half the battle

Even though I got up pretty early this morning — well, before 9 is early-ish for a Saturday, right? — I didn’t do a whole lot with the day. I thought I might go see Scott Pilgrim vs. the World, but I ended up not. This evening, though, I did watch the live-action G.I. Joe movie, and…well, maybe I should just let the record of my live-tweeting of the movie speak for itself:

  • And now, even though I am almost certain to regret it, I’m going to watch the live-action G.I. Joe.
  • It’s starting with trailers for The Last Airbender and Transformers 2. This can’t end well.
  • “In the not too distant future”? Is this MST3K?
  • You know, with Eccleston’s Scottish accent, it just might be.
  • There is no CGI in Team.
  • Channing Tatum isn’t exactly what I’d call an electrifying screen presence.
  • Is Brendan Fraser legally required to be in every movie with CGI?
  • I didn’t think it was possible, but this may be *more* cartoonish than the original.
  • Oh good. For a minute there I was worried there wouldn’t be any jetpacks.
  • Aw, Lil Storm Shadow vs. Lil Snake Eyes.
  • When the smartest guy in the room is Marlon Wayans, be afraid.
  • This movie has almost as many unearned emotional moments and pointless flashbacks as it does things blowing up real good.
  • Oh, they must be in France. They nearly ran down a mime in a beret.
  • I am sort of wondering when the movie based on G.I. Joe begins.
  • Oh, the Baroness just made a man lose his balloons. She *is* evil.
  • Oh good. More Jim Henson’s Angry Ninja Babies.
  • These flashbacks belong in a movie where we care about the characters.
  • A movie with robot sharks under the polar ice caps should be more fun than this.
  • And shorter.
  • So, Joseph Gordon-Levitt *can* give a bad performance just like everybody else.
  • I’m going to go out on a limb and say this isn’t a terrible movie. But only because I’m not convinced it *is* a movie.
  • It’s more like a computer-generated string of pure ridiculousness.
  • The plane only speaks Celtic. Of course.
  • I wish Storm Shadow had taken a vow of silence too.
  • “My green screen can beat up your green screen.”
  • Christopher Eccleston would make a good Groundskeeper Willie.
  • “Muhahaha! You and what army?” “MY army.” Yeah, that really just happened.
  • And of course it ends with a Black Eyed Peas song.
  • Not with a bang, but with a whimpering will i am.
  • The movie had a production accountant named Gene Strange. That may be my favorite thing about it.
  • I did not hate that movie. It was too far beyond dumb to elicit any kind of emotional response whatsoever.
  • “American Humane Association monitored some of the animal action. No animals were harmed in those scenes.” All the rest, though…
  • How is “G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra” not on @rifftrax?
  • Who could have guessed, when The Mummy first came out, that it would mark the *high* point in Stephen Sommers’ pursuit of realism?

I can’t claim to have enjoyed the movie, but I did have fun poking at it. I would seriously rent the movie again if it was available on Rifftrax. But otherwise, I don’t think I want to go anywhere near it again.

Otherwise, it was a pretty boring day, hanging around the house, going for a walk, reading some Kaleidotrope slush. Just a typical Saturday.

It’s madness!

Not much to say. Had a fun time at the Rifftrax live showing of Reefer Madness. I’d never seen the movie before (nor, in fact, ever smoked “marihuana” before), but it is about as ridiculous a film as you’d expect. The shorts were quite as nightmare-fuel-ish as the ones they played at last year’s Christmas show, but I don’t think I’ll ever look at grass or gasoline quite the same way again.

Grabbed some pizza with fellow cappers tinaw, GizM, and GersonK before the show, and just got home a few minutes ago. Now it’s off to bed.

The sword of self-knowledge

“Sever the ignorant doubt in your heart with the sword of self-knowledge.”

That’s what my fortune cookie said this evening, anyway. A quick search suggests it’s from the Bhagavad Gita, which seems an odd and unexpected source of fortune-cookie wisdom, but it is a nice sentiment nevertheless.

It ties in a little weirdly with a movie I watched this evening, the Korean film Mother, where the title character twice suggests acupuncture to “loosen the knots in your heart and clear all the horrible memories from your mind.” It was a weirder movie overall than I expected…though, having seen Joon-ho Bong’s previous film, The Host, maybe I should have expected that. They’re very different movies — Mother has no giant monsters crawling from the Seoul River and attacking people, for instance — but they’re both a little off-kilter. It’s an interesting movie, about the lengths a mother will go to prove her son’s innocence, but it was ultimately a lot stranger than I bargained for.

Other than that, the day was spent not doing too much. We had a redo of last Saturday‘s attempt to get the car inspected. This morning, my father and I encountered no strange traffic, no police cars blocking roads, nobody else at the garage to get the last of the inspection stickers. It went off without a hitch.

I can’t say the same for my attempt to buy eyeglasses this afternoon. Two weeks ago, I went with my mother to a discount frames warehouse her boss had recommended, and I made an appointment with their optometrist. The appointment itself went well, and my prescription hasn’t really changed. It hasn’t changed at all in the right eye in over a decade, which is where I have the astigmatism. (The left eye changes, mostly, just as it tries to compensate.) The optometrist asked me how long I’ve been wearing glasses, and she wasn’t at all surprised when I told her it’s been since I was about two or three. She said that, usually, when she sees an astigmatism like mine, the person with it has a lazy eye. Which, if my mother hadn’t thought to take me to the eye doctor when I was young — mostly because I was her first child and she worried, not because I had any symptoms — is something I’d probably have.

Something I definitely don’t have — and check out that seamless segue there — are new eyeglasses. Unfortunately, my prescription is beyond their capabilities, too thick or too high or too something to be done by them. So unfortunately I’ll need to have it filled elsewhere. I don’t desperately need new glasses, so I’m going to hold off until I can find somewhere with relatively low prices. The last time I bought new frames was a year or two ago, and both of them snapped in less than a year. Then one of the replacement pairs snapped. So I’m looking to find something that’s a cross between decent quality and decent price.

I’ll just have to keep my eyes open, no pun intended.

I read a little more slush for Kaleidotrope, though stories keep coming in. I was really glad to re-open to submissions in January, but I’m just as happy to be closing to them again tomorrow. I’ll re-open again in January of 2011, and I think I’ll keep the same reading period, more or less, going forward.

And I’ve been using the kneeling chair a little more. The padding on this one isn’t all that great — I guess you get what you pay for — so it’s a little unforgiving on my shins. I don’t know that my back feels any better for it overall, but sitting in it does seem to cause less discomfort than sitting in a regular chair. At least in my lower back. My shins, as I said, are kind of taking a beating.

And that’s it, really, for Saturday.

Thursday various

  • Scholars beware!

    Experts on the various fungi that feed on the pages and on the covers of books are increasingly convinced that you can get high–or at least a little wacky–by sniffing old books. Fungus on books, they say, is a likely source of hallucinogenic spores. [via]

  • I have to admit, I didn’t immediately understand this video (a collaboration with NPR’s Radiolab), but I liked it enough to re-watch from the beginning once my brain kicked in. [via]
  • I have no idea if the new Scott Pilgrim movie will be any good or not. Some say awesome, some not so much. I know this will lose me some indie geek cred, but I’ve been stuck halfway through the first volume for several months, not particularly loving it. That said, I can totally get behind this:

    There’s no reason to be angry at the people you imagine a movie will make happy just because you didn’t like the movie. [via]

  • Oh come on, it’s an honest mistake. [via]
  • And finally, I need to start riding the subways more often!

Wednesday various

  • You know, if you’re going to get a tramp stamp lower-back tatoo
  • The other day, I posed a question on Twitter and Facebook: grammatically, should it be the Beatles or The Beatles? I wasn’t interested so much in this particular example, but what people thought about the capitalization of the lead-in article. My question brought in a flurry of responses, some very well thought out, most in favor of capitalizing the “The,” only one (not in favor) citing an actual style guide, but I don’t think we reached anything like a consensus. It’s one of those things that boils down, for the most part, to personal aesthetics. I almost always write the Beatles, lower-case t, just as I almost always don’t italicize the “the” before “the New York Times.” You can find lots of people (and style guides) that dictate one or the other, but it pretty much comes down to personal preference. This particular example wasn’t work-related, so I didn’t have the APA style guide to fall back on. Despite what I usually do, this time I went with the capital T.

    I bring all of this up simply because I was amused to see my initial question listed among Wikipedia’s lamest edit wars. You have to know which battles are worth picking. [via]

  • No E-Books Allowed in This Establishment. Just lame.
  • On the one hand, I’m intrigued by the idea of an Outer Limits movie. On the other hand, maybe a financially troubled studio and a pair of Saw writers aren’t the best people to see it through.

    I do find it curious that none of the reports I’ve seen mention the more recent ’90s adaptation of the show — which, for better or worse, ran 5 years longer than the original.

  • And finally, Jacob Weisberg on Sarah Palin:

    The non-Sarah Dittoheads among us have to decide whether to regard this babble—favoring creation science, aerial wolf-shooting, and freedom of the press, so long as the press is “accurate”—as scary or funny. During the 2008 campaign, when there was a real chance that Palin could become the automatic successor to an impulsive, elderly cancer survivor, I found it more scary than funny. After McCain lost, and after Palin terminated her governorship in the effusion of furious gibberish known as her resignation speech, I have found it mostly funny. To be alarmed by Palin today presumes a Republican Party suicidal enough to want her to do more than run its weekend paintball games.

    Me, I’m still a little scared. In today’s politics of the right, crazy is quickly becoming the new sane, and crazy seems to love it some Sarah Palin, you betcha. [via]