1. What’s your favorite piece of clothing that you currently own? I own two very comfortable pairs of shoes, as well as a silky-smooth green buttoned shirt from Geoffrey Beene that I particularly like.

2. What piece of clothing do you most want to acquire? I absolutely hate shopping for clothes. There’s nothing I want to acquire. For awhile I desperately needed new shoes, and I keep thinking a terrycloth robe would be nice, but, for now, I’m good.

3. What piece of clothing can you not bring yourself to get rid of? Why? I own a lot of plaid, but I’ve been trying not to wear it as often since, with the beard, it tends to foster shouts of “Hey! It’s Al from Tool Time!” Which is maybe funny, but only the first time you hear it. In particular, I have this hideously plaid shirt, lumberjack-red with yellow stripes that you really can’t focus your eyes on too long without getting a headache, which I keep only in the hope that someday I’ll get to use it to inflict terror on unsuspecting masses or wear it as a costume in one of the Monty Python Society’s parades or performances. It really is an ugly shirt, though.

4. What piece of clothing do you look your best in? Beats me. Maybe that green shirt. I wear it often enough.