Again, my weekly horoscope from The Onion:

Aries: (March 21—April 19)

Reviews will claim you have “reinvented the coming-of-age story” and “singlehandedly raised the bar for first novels,” but you don’t recall doing anything.

I’m starting to really like these little e-mails from eHow.com. They’re never helpful–far from it–but they’re often amusing, and today is no exception:

Oh well. I suppose something must be wrong with the website today, and I guess I’ll just have to wait until tomorrow to find out how to make myself irresistible to the opposite sex and how to choose a flattering hairstyle. It’s always something

Reblogger doesn’t seem to be working right now. So why not use this as an excuse to send me e-mail? I like getting e-mail. And I know you’re out there. Or I hope you’re out there. Is anyone out there? Man, it has not been a happy day. At least on Friday I get to do this again.

In an e-mail entitled “The best spam ever”, Lianna writes: “Attract Men with Bigger Breasts!” Good deal! I want a guy with at least a C cup…

And in other news, HAPPY HALLOWEEN!! I have no plans (unless you can count seriously looking for another job as Halloween plans), and the closest I came to a costume are black socks with ghosts and ghouls on them. Maybe I’ll have some candycorn at lunch.

Zoinks! Something’s rotten in Denmark. Scooby-Doo meets Hamlet, courtesy of Geegaw. It’s not exactly what I’d call funny (and, as I remember it, Velma, not Daphne, says Jinkies, not Jenkies), but it’s an amusing idea nonetheless.